Eh, Maybe Texas

By Jordan Ginsberg • Jan 30th, 2009 • Category: ModBlog


Burgh heard the screams, the cries, and before he ever saw it, he knew exactly what had happened. He ran out into the backyard and there it was: His daughter, Sophie, on her first birthday, had killed and eaten a Smurf. Look at that face, that uninhibited bloodlust. Why? Who knows why. Sophie’s not talking. And not a jury in the world is going to convict a baby.

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Jordan Ginsberg is the managing editor and head writer for BME.
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51 Responses »

  1. Brittney on January 30th, 2009 at 12:18 pm:

    haha oh my!
    he looks like a cute little zombie that eats the brains of cupcakes :D

    this picture made my morning.

  2. blindedbyfear on January 30th, 2009 at 12:24 pm:

    thats honestly the most adorable thing i have ever seen.

  3. drew on January 30th, 2009 at 12:26 pm:

    i like the Awww tag

  4. Warren on January 30th, 2009 at 12:40 pm:

    i think more people need to loosen up and do this on their birthday, or as often as possible. Looks like fun.

  5. Lil Miss Strange on January 30th, 2009 at 12:40 pm:

    that is officially the cutest picture and best modblog post i have ever seen!

  6. Heather on January 30th, 2009 at 12:56 pm:

    oh my god, cutest picture ever.

  7. natalie on January 30th, 2009 at 1:05 pm:

    Aw, my God, adorable.
    :]

  8. emily on January 30th, 2009 at 1:25 pm:

    this is SO CUUUTE

    that sweet vicious baby.. already so much raw power! theres no telling what little Sophie will be capable of in the coming years.

    Happy birthday Sophie!

  9. Christian on January 30th, 2009 at 1:29 pm:

    Those poor smurfs. It’s blood lust is unquenchable!!!

  10. sheldo on January 30th, 2009 at 1:30 pm:

    Aaaaw! Definitely the cutest modblog entry :)

  11. PinkMotion on January 30th, 2009 at 1:41 pm:

    What a cutie! :D

  12. SDietz on January 30th, 2009 at 1:57 pm:

    I remember when my little cousin turned one we got her a little cake to make a mess of.
    So adorable!

    And I’m loving the fan fiction.

  13. swoon on January 30th, 2009 at 2:00 pm:

    AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

    this is SUCH an adorable picture!!! <3

  14. nickles on January 30th, 2009 at 2:12 pm:

    this is so cute!! what an adorble baby!!
    loved this post, and storyy! haha, good morning start, eh?

  15. nickles on January 30th, 2009 at 2:13 pm:

    *side note
    shirt is awesome!

  16. blindedbyfear on January 30th, 2009 at 2:22 pm:

    also;
    om nom nom nom

  17. VOMIT on January 30th, 2009 at 4:48 pm:

    I think its really funny how the kid has like no hair, but still manages to have a ponytail haha

  18. BME: Tattoo, Piercing and Body Modification News » ModBlog » The Horror on January 30th, 2009 at 5:00 pm:

    [...] poor woman was among the innocent bystanders in the vicious Smurf attack on which we reported earlier. How does a person recover after being sprayed with the plasma of [...]

  19. Patrick on January 30th, 2009 at 5:51 pm:

    Am I the only one who thinks those cupcakes look fucking delicious?

  20. yex on January 30th, 2009 at 5:52 pm:

    I looked at the pic and was thinking about cupcakes before reading the story…I nearly spit out my orange juice when it turned to Smurf murder. Epic. xD

  21. killahkelly on January 30th, 2009 at 7:14 pm:

    OMG AMAZING I LOVE THIS.

  22. PsychoticCupcake on January 30th, 2009 at 8:07 pm:

    Ohh the poor cupcakes.

  23. Torra on January 30th, 2009 at 8:26 pm:

    Normally your captions make me sick in the stomach, but this one was exactly where my mind went. Love it. Uber cure baby.

  24. BME: Tattoo, Piercing and Body Modification News » ModBlog » This Week in BME on January 30th, 2009 at 10:01 pm:

    [...] This baby killed a Smurf. But you can take her word for it, the Smurf had it comin’. When that…. [...]

  25. laurel on January 30th, 2009 at 10:48 pm:

    I LOVE IT! A

    ARRRR! she looks just like a zombie child-doll SOOOOOO CUTE!

  26. Rulebook on January 31st, 2009 at 1:50 am:

    That baby is not wearing gloves!

  27. mela on January 31st, 2009 at 9:31 am:

    *callsPeta

  28. Stormchaser on January 31st, 2009 at 11:25 am:

    so nice and cute :-)

  29. Shawn Porter on January 31st, 2009 at 12:25 pm:

    Haha… cute babies + cupcakes= always good.

  30. jelque on January 31st, 2009 at 7:40 pm:

    Texas maybe? No… This is SPARTAAAAAAA!!!†††

    Alright… who is going to make this the next motivational poster?

  31. Squig on February 1st, 2009 at 12:25 am:

    haha looks like shes doing a re-enactment ” i went aaaaaa nom nom nom nom”

  32. Chopstixx on February 1st, 2009 at 1:04 am:

    “No jury is going to convict a baby…maybe Texas.”

  33. Frankie T. on February 1st, 2009 at 2:18 am:

    cutest thing ever :)

  34. Burcu on February 1st, 2009 at 9:33 am:

    This is beyond adorable!!!

  35. Bettie Cracker on February 1st, 2009 at 10:28 am:

    That is absolutely freaking cute as heck.
    And his shirt is awesomesauce, btw.

  36. Isa on February 1st, 2009 at 5:59 pm:

    Hee hee, that is so cute!

  37. Natasha on February 2nd, 2009 at 10:03 am:

    That’s just adorable. ^_^

  38. Burgh on February 2nd, 2009 at 6:28 pm:

    man she jacked that smurf up good!!!

  39. BME: Tattoo, Piercing and Body Modification News » ModBlog » You Know More Than You Think You Do on February 3rd, 2009 at 12:00 pm:

    [...] the murderer’s row of babies on the old ModBlog lately, no? First we had last week’s Smurficide, and now Back Sass Jezebel’s stunning little Dahlia Grace here just made my heart explode. [...]

  40. hey you on February 3rd, 2009 at 9:53 pm:

    does nayone else even notice those disgusting ass nose gauges?

    EWWW

    gross as fuckkkk. like really….why the fuck? would you want 4 holes in your nose.

    ugly,stupid,pointless.

    cutee baby :P

  41. Louie (Mexican Mutant) on February 3rd, 2009 at 10:41 pm:

    I just have to say this picture makes me laugh everytime I see it! This is why kids are so great.

  42. Mandie on February 5th, 2009 at 7:25 pm:

    This is sooo cute. ^.^ I just had to show everyone in my house

  43. e on February 5th, 2009 at 8:08 pm:

    the caption is funnier than the picture

  44. Mandy on February 6th, 2009 at 6:20 am:

    “ahhhhhh”

    love the expression on the bubs face…totally adorable

  45. eldritch on February 7th, 2009 at 6:14 am:

    What ? They make blue mayo now ? Must be a fucking japanese new trend

  46. links for 2009-02-08 at bananas on toast on February 8th, 2009 at 6:03 am:

    [...] Eh, Maybe Texas One of the few blog entries to mention a baby, ever, without being too OTT with cutesie… (tags: humor) Share and Enjoy: [...]

  47. BME: Tattoo, Piercing and Body Modification News » ModBlog » Any Wang Will Do on February 14th, 2009 at 3:43 pm:

    [...] Day, ModBlog! Here is Beorn and his amazing multicolored wang, with piercings by Burgh (he of the Smurficidal offspring). Click through for the whole [...]

  48. grossedout on March 28th, 2009 at 12:09 pm:

    oh good. another disgusting and unsanitary baby picture.

    and it has nothing to do with body mods.

  49. Bill Vincent on April 15th, 2009 at 3:43 pm:

    Best stumble all day. Going to be checking back from now on…great pic.

  50. Myke on June 10th, 2009 at 4:19 pm:

    #40, shut up.

  51. BME: Tattoo, Piercing and Body Modification News » ModBlog » The Calm Brow on June 16th, 2009 at 12:22 pm:

    [...] Pennsylvania. And the cutting? Well, it’s on Burgh, who you may remember from spawning this murderous little darling. You want a shot of his face? Yeah, just poke around after the [...]

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