Unfit from the get go
At A Glance
Author GunmetalSpikes
Contact [email protected]
IAM GunmetalSpikes
When It just happened
Unfortunately, like many of you throughout the modified community, there are a few factors in this life of mine that have prevented me from modifying myself to the extent that I would like, one of the principal ones being the environment I work in. I was told in a roundabout way last year that if I followed through with the bridge piercing I was planning to have done, I would be denied an upcoming raise and promotion. Ergo, no bridge.

I recently had my first play piercing session with Russ, my piercer. I found it to be a great experience, and would recommend it to anyone who is thinking about it. Intense and dizzying, I saw a beauty in my own body and mind that I had thought impossible. Even though the pain of this was minimal, I consider it a rite of passage for myself in a spiritual sense. As with many mods, there were mixed reactions from various friends that I showed my pictures to. Some were repulsed, some curious, some were even impressed, but one smarmy comment stood out above the rest.

"And you're going to be someone's Mother one day?!"

Is that really relevant? Really? How would a play piercing session affect the life of a child that I have not even contemplated conceiving? My narrow-minded statistic of a friend then brought up the fact that I have been thinking about designing a sleeve for myself. I, stunned in the head, I suppose, failed to see her point. With great delight she declared

"You can't be someone's Mother if you're covered with tattoos!"

How is it that the vast majority cannot separate people who have chosen to modify their bodies and just happen to be parents from the ranks of criminally negligent child abusers? I have yet to watch a news program in which an insane and disturbed individual that has killed their entire family sports a single visible body modification. I have not met an unfit parent that wears a tattoo sleeve or has a facial piercing. A person's sense of good judgment and reason does not decrease in proportion to their modifications, contrary to popular belief. Their sense of self and their own spirituality, however, tend to increase.

I have, however, met many unfit parents who have had their children forcibly removed from their care that look "normal". I have seen many serial killers on television that have an absolutely upstanding appearance. It could be that there is a connection between lusting after the "pristine" human condition and negative tendencies. Eating disorders come to mind.

Let me take this one step further, if I may, and state that I believe unmodified people are repressed people. Someone's capacity to lose control of their actions and emotions correlates directly with their view of themselves. If they are not comfortable with who they are in their own skin, they are not comfortable with who anyone else is.

Someone who has explored their own personality and invested the thought, time and care to visibly accent it in front of the world is someone that society should feel more apt to trust than someone who has simply taken their body for granted and allowed it to remain static over decades. My point-if they have allowed that to happen to their body, they have allowed it to happen to their mind. Who would make the better parent if we were to weigh these two types of candidates against each other? A person who is so at home with their individuality that they have taken the time and interest to do things to their body that make them feel more at home in it or someone who has not realised how much they are worth and has such a high level of insecurity that they are willing to make snap judgments on others based solely upon appearance?

Now, put the thought of body modification out of your mind and read that last question again. Even a psychologist would agree with me on that one. Neurotic parents raise sickly, insecure, unhappy children that spend most of their lives maladjusted to their surroundings. Mental illness, depression and abuse of any kind are far rarer among self-actualized people. Modification is a form of self-awareness and actualization.

The stigma of the "jailhouse tattoo" is long gone, along with the poodle skirt and the belief that kissing causes pregnancy, but some cling to it with a grip so fierce that it's strength is almost commendable.

The idea that I might "warp" my children by allowing them to see a tattoo on my arm or a piercing in my face is as absurd as thinking that I would do the same to them if I dyed my hair or lost weight. Facelifts and breast implants are widely accepted for women who have had children, even thought of as beneficial to a woman's self-esteem. In my opinion, ink is going to do a lot more for my own self-esteem than some fake boobies, but according to a majority vote it is a nasty thing for a girl who wants to be a mommy.

Somehow, I don't see the connection between six hours under the gun and child protective services.


Disclaimer: The experience above was submitted by a BME reader and has not
been edited. We can not guarantee that the experience is accurate, truthful,
or contains valid or even safe advice. We strongly urge you to use BME and
other resources to educate yourself so you can make safe informed decisions.


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