Understanding Permanence
At A Glance
Author Uberkitty
Contact [email protected]
IAM Uberkitty
When N/A
Given I'm so open about both the modifications I currently have and those I'm planning I frequently find myself speaking to unmodified people; classmates, friends of friends, waitresses and so on. They always want to understand why I'm doing this and I likewise want to understand why they don't (something which tends to surprise them. They always seem to think the reasons to not modify yourself are obvious.)

When I ask what they don't understand about it time and time again it eventually comes down to the same thing "but it's permanent." I try to explain, over and over that the permanence is really the point. The body is really the only thing an individual can ever truly own. Yes we can buy cars, houses, expensive clothes, and all sorts of material possessions but these are not lasting, they can all be taken from us. Cars can be wretched, houses can burn down and take most everything you own along with it, clothes eventually wear out or go out of style. Yet for most people these transient things are what they use to visually portray to the world who they are. The lack of permanence seems very problematic to me. It allows people to so easily change the way they present themselves. They can tailor who they want to be to different groups of people. They can lie about who they really are. It almost seems to me the reason not to judge a book by its cover is because the cover c an be changed. There is no way to tell if the cover is real or fake.

It's not just material objects that are used like this either. If you look at the way people in the "mainstream" culture manipulate their bodies it's normally in ways that can changed; fashion, makeup, haircuts and styling, etc. It's true I myself use these temporary tools too, but when I make permanent changes to my body those are always what draw attention first and foremost. Is it because so many people look down on these, or don't understand them? Maybe that's part of it, but I think it is more important that they cannot be hidden or undone. They are somehow purer because there is no way I could have selected to look that way at that particular moment go gain favor. No, these are changes I made to myself for myself. I change my body to fit my self image and in doing so also show to world who I think I am. If they don't like it that's their problem but I'm not changing myself for them. I've taken ownership of my body from society and made it mine.

The question becomes if permanent modifications are truer representations of the self then why haven't more people chosen to pursue them? Why is it people still chose to change there bodies only in ways that can be undone? I can't understand it because most of the reasons but I've heard many arguments. Some people have told me they believe God owns them because as the creator he made them exactly as he wished. But then again many of the people that say this don't see a problem with women piercing their ears or wearing a little makeup. Are they saying that God just doesn't want them to change themselves unless society thinks it's normal? Others think that their parents own there bodies and they can only change themselves in ways that their parents approve of. While this makes more sense it seems to just be an extension of the argument that society owns the people within it. So many people, even ones that say they make every decision as an individual, fall to the pressures of society. Temporary changes are safe because they can always go back and conform to what society demands while kidding themselves that they can do whatever they want to themselves. It seems that often they don't even realize they are doing this. Even when they say permanent modifications are somehow "different" from temporary ones they don't think their reasons for thinking so means they are giving into social pressures.

The second type of argument I hear people use against permanent modifications is that people change and that if you don't always stay the same you could end up regretting the way you changed your body. I've heard this again and again in news stories about tattoo removal. Someone has left there old life behind and they no longer like the tattoo of their partners name. While it's true that people often change I don't think this is a reason to say permanent modifications are wrong or will automatically be regretted one day. I doubt most people change so drastically that they hate the person they once were and never want to remember their "previous life." In fact I find many people modify themselves to remember important points in there lives long into the future. It would be wrong to say they will one day want to forget who they were and what they did.

While I believe the permanence of my body modifications is one of the main reasons to pursue them I realize that other people do not agree with me. It does however sadden me to a degree to hear that people believe that they are owned by society or fear they will change to the point they hate their current selves. I just hope they can at least understand my motivation, even if they don't agree with it. I try to understand theirs.

Disclaimer: The experience above was submitted by a BME reader and has not
been edited. We can not guarantee that the experience is accurate, truthful,
or contains valid or even safe advice. We strongly urge you to use BME and
other resources to educate yourself so you can make safe informed decisions.


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