While this is a popular subject in these editorials, I thought I might share some of my thoughts on this. But first some background info. Three weeks ago I had to remove my Madison surface piercing due to rejection after eight months, I was heartbroken. Being the person I am, I had to get something to replace the void that was left by removing my piercing. Upon receiving a 12 gauge septum piercing, one of my first thoughts on leaving the store was "what will everyone think?" Before I returned home I flipped my retainer up into my nose since that's what the piercer recommended and I did not want to catch shit from any of my friends when I got home. Infact, I was so worried what others will say about me, I almost thought about never letting them know I got it.
At A Glance Author Ben Clayton Contact [email protected] IAM pancakes When A week ago Location California Once home I talked to a friend about having to take my Madison out, and how sad I was about it. He did not understand why I was so depressed over a piercing, I mean it's just a piece of metal right? Rather then trying to understand my heartache and where I was coming from, he coined the sentence, "Well without it, you look like a normal person". This hurt, a lot. Though I am not sure why it did so much; this wasn't the first time someone said I was "weird" or a "freak" for having my mods. This got me thinking, did all my friends and family really look at me as a weirdo? I don't see myself as different from them, even with the mods, but apparently they do.
A week ago, my mom stopped by to go to the doctors with me. She saw that I have had my ears pierced at 6 gauge since the last time she saw me, now she didn't care about that (my parents seem to be very understanding on my mods), but she did ask if I was planning to stretch them. I replied with a yes, she then almost begged that I wouldn't, stating "what will happen when you are 60 and don't want that anymore?" I tried to state that it is no more permanent then my tattoos, and that this is something I love, and hopefully will continue to love for the remainder of my life.
Why were people so worried about what I do to myself and that I wont look normal with the mods? This led me to start thinking, what is normal and why does no one have the same idea of what it is?
I have to hide my piercings at work, but not my tattoos so I am fortunate enough for that. While I understand why it could be in poor business taste to allow piercings in the work place, due to customer's reactions, I do not understand why that is less acceptable then a tattoo. Why are tattoos and more popular piercings okay in society, but the second someone sees something a little out of the ordinary, they deem the person with the mod as a "freak"? Why is it when my roommate and his girlfriend see a picture of someone who had scarification they call it "stupid" or "disgusting" whereas I want to call it beautiful, but out of fear of being called weird I stay silent. I wasn't any different from my friends growing up, though they intrigued me as a small child, I never wanted a mod until my later years. I was raised in an open minded household, but no one in my family had tattoos or anything but an ear piercing, so I wasn't influenced there. So why am I different then most people when it comes to mods? My friends girlfriend seems to be worried about if it's cute or not, but I say to her, why worry about what others think, isn't all that really matters is what you think? What is it embedded in our brains that makes us see what is "acceptable" as different things.
I may have a chance to do something I have been wanting to for a very long time in a few months, a suspension. I do not plan on telling many people about it prior to doing it; I do not want to have to try to explain why to them. Hopefully I will get the chance to do it, and hopefully people will understand I want to do it to gain a deeper understanding of who I am and what I am capable of. I know they probably won't, and once again I will be put in the spotlight as the freak of the group. But who knows, maybe one day they will understand.
While I don't speak for everyone, I am comfortable with making this statement on my behalf. I get modded, and will continue to through out my life, in an effort to feel free in my body. I want to look the same way I feel. As clich� as it sounds, I don't want to be different, I just want to be me. Something about having a piercing or tattoo makes me feel good about myself, almost empowered. With everyone I feel like I am a step closer to becoming who I really am. I feel like with these things in and on my body, I will be a better person, perhaps more understanding and open to the world around me.
While writing this I was hoping to answer my question, insted I seemed to have ranted about personal experiences of what I find acceptable. Maybe that means normal just varies from person to person? Earlier in this article I mentioned a friends girlfriend who was worried about if a mod would be cute or not, and the possibility of not getting something because it wouldn't be normal. I always looked down on when people did this, until I realized that I too am striving to be accepted as "normal" by others, why else would I be trying to write an article on how I am as normal as anyone? So what is normal? I suppose there is no answer to this question since no matter what I will say it won't change your mind on body mods. While I am not trying to change your views on what is normal to you, I would like you to think about keeping your opinions about this to yourself unless asked and to try to be more understanding why people get modded. We don't do it for you, we do it for ourselves and that's all you need to know.