I'm 19, female, modified and I'm a Computer Science student in a top central London university. My ears are stretched to 22mm (but have been up briefly up to 30mm), I've got three facial piercings and a hefty rib piece tattoo. Yesterday evening I took out my rose quartz plugs and decided to say buh-bye to the stretchings I've had for three years.
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For several reasons. Firstly, when I grow up I fully plan to be an investment banker. I'm in my second year of uni, which means that in a couple of months I will be having a LOT of interviews for summer internships and, hopefully, in around 5 months I'll have my 12-week placement at a bank that will lead to me obtaining an awesome job the following year. First impressions count and although it would be wonderful to believe that everyone knows it's what's on the inside that matters...that's not the real world. Not in multi-million pound finance corporations, anyway. In an industry already saturated with first-grade degree applicants, where appearance counts, I simply cannot afford to disadvantage myself. It's hard enough as it is.
Secondly, one reason I began to stretch was because meeting my best friend Nadia (who had 6mm lobes at the time) was a turning point in my life. I wanted to pay a tribute to the girl who was one of the only positive things I had while going through a disastrous two years at high school, where I had not a single friend and no-one to talk to about it and got pretty fed up to say the least. I also stretched because I thought stretchings look beautiful. Pure aesthetics.
During term time, I share a house with Nadia. I see her every day. She's been one of my best friends for three years and won't go away any time soon. I've been there for her and she's been there for me. I don't need stretched lobes to remind me of her because I'm fortunate enough to be able to see her nearly every single day. As for aesthetics, I still think stretched ears are fabulous...I just don't think potential future banker employees will think the same.
Of course I'm a supporter of standing up for yourself and what you believe in and if ever anyone has said anything ridiculous to me about any of my choices I'll defend myself and set them straight. But I also like nice things. I like MiuMiu bags and Chanel make-up and Nike trainers. A pair of Jimmy Choo shoes and a Louis Vuitton purse are also lurking around my bedroom somewhere. I know friends and family, life experiences and having fun are what is most important...but it's nice to have nice things.
In addition to this, you need money to have basic things. Housing, food, clothes, pay the bills... I'm a student right now but after next year I'm out in the big bad world and from there on in, it's up to me. It's a trade-off between visible modifications that were important to me this time last year, and the image I need to project to get a job this time next year. I shouldn't have to, but I do. I've worked hard to get to this point.
It's lame, but I'm not going to be the one who changes enough perceptions to make a difference; not in this industry anyway. Maybe when I'm partner of an investment bank I'll stretch back up again but I'm not sure that when I'm all grown up it'll matter that much anymore.
You've got to grow up some time and although taking out a pair of rose quartz 22mm plugs doesn't take me there all at once, it's a step.
Yeah, maybe I could have trained to go into a different profession. Something arty where I could keep my stretched lobes and facial piercings, maybe? But I'm not arty and I don't want to go down that path. I shouldn't have to go into a profession I don't want to keep my piercings; likewise I shouldn't really have to take them out because I'm in a profession I DO enjoy. I've chosen to have a life full of work so that I can get some money to indulge in nice things and so that I can have fun with my friends and take care of my family.
I just very much hope that I don't lose sight of what's truly important along the way. That's partly what my tattoo was about. I just know that if I ever make it, when I'm in charge of interviewing the penultimate year undergraduates I won't turn them down because they've got holes in their face...I'll turn them down because they're not as clever or as interesting as the next kid in line.