I've been getting more mail lately, and with more mail, comes more fun mail! We'll start with the average UR SICK mail.

From: Chris LeBlanc <[email protected]> Your site is fucking sick. Who the hell would do those things to themselves? Hammering nails through their testicales? I'm sorry, but that is totally fucked up. You need serious help.

I always wonder why these people came to BME, because if you're just looking at the piercing pix you won't see the heavier pictures. You only see the heavier pictures if you browse more thouroughly. In this next guy, I just KNOW that he was here looking for porn. I can't stop laughing when I think of this guy desperately searching the net for women to masturbate over, then he hits BME, sees the stills from the ROY video, and is rendered impotent for months!

From: Scott L-R <[email protected]> Subject: Your sick fucking videos Where the FUCK did you pick up roy? I mean do you not have any compasion? What the hell was on your mind when you did this? He is a god damn human being. How would you like it if I did that shit to your testicles? I am sorry to see that mankind has dropped low and started torturing other people's genitals and THEN put it on video. You are just one sick human being, and may god have mercy on your useless, pathetic soul. Unlike you, I am not a highschool dropout who has nothing better to do than go around mutilating peoples genitals. Good for you, I hope you make your money. I make more money than you and I will bet dimes on dollars to that remark.

For those that read rec.arts.bodyart (you should), you may have noticed me arguing lately that the people into body modification that read BME are smarter and more talented than the average person. Maybe I'm wrong -- you may be able to decipher this message, but what kind of person spells almost EVERY SINGLE WORD wrong? I should add that as far as I can tell this came from North America -- if it was from a non-English speaker it wouldn't be so strange.

what are the seprate names of the peircings of an verdical inderstural???

I'm going to assume that this next one is from a person trying to have a baby, not from a pedophile. I suppose this is a valid question, but the wording is quite funny:

Subject: Re: Male Piercing Does the "Prince Albert" interfer (sp) with babies? I apprieciate all of your information. Do you recomend anyone piecer in Albuquerque New Mexico USA? Again thank you for your help...

As always, people don't stop asking for free stuff. Maybe someone can send them some pictures (but not a password!):

From: [email protected] Subject: pictures please send us some more pictures and information from your archives. Thank you

From: <[email protected]> Subject: (no subject) send me the passwords bye

Here's another funny one -- obviously from someone who hasn't been using computers for long at all. They keep trying to type in their password, and all that happens is stars appear! Is their keyboard broken? Is it my web page??? I suppose we were all here at one point...

Subject: password I tried again and from my computer i get xxxxxx across my password every time I make an attempt to access the advance part of this site.

I printed most of them last time, but the angry customers that don't get it never seem to end. This one asked me to cancel his account, so I sent him a mail asking me to forward his transaction number which he had just received via automated email. I know he had it because he included the header of the message in what he sent me:

Subject: Re: Notice of pending membership rebilling what transaction #? If I need to call my bank/reditcard and put a stop on it will cost me $20. You have all the info frrom your server etc and you should be able to stop this. I don 't know how to stop it and if I have to hire an attorney which I hate after I have spent $20000. in the last 10 years then I will and I can also start writting letters to various government organizations to stop this bullshit.

And finally, my favorite. I've gotten this one a few times from them. If anyone can help them out, please let them know. It's not something that I sell, and probably never will.

From: BRIAN & GAIL PETERSON <[email protected]> Subject: Men's Underwear Hi Shannon, I'm looking for some nylon, satin men's underwear for under dress pants. Cotton is OK but bulky in some circumstances. Also, I'm looking for a girdle type pant and pantliner for dress pants. Is this something that you offer? Possible to get a catelog mailed to me......Thanks Brian

More for you when I get it! Keep the mail coming. To all those that send me real mail, thanks, it's what makes doing BME worth it!