Distinguishing Feature: wanting to belong to two tribes. The tribe that calls itself 'normal' on one side, and at the same time to the tribe that thrives on being different.

I am a law graduate who wants to make myself a career (for the next few years at least)in the structured economic world of business. I am also an avid body-art/modification enthusiast, who wants to re-create my body in my own image. The two do not go together easily. It will be difficult going to an interview in a corporate environment with my lobes stretched further than they are now (approximately 18mm). It will be more difficult to convince 'straight' clients that I am credible and worthy of their business when they cannot keep their conservative eyes off my 5mm diameter septum ring.

Let it first be said that on a personal level I care very little what conservative-minded people think of me. I come from what could be the archetypal conservative society- South Africa. Three years after the change of government in my beautiful country, the means of production and corporate wealth are still in the hands of the conservative people who still, in many cases, honestly believe that 'white' and 'black' people are intrinsically different from one another, for example, not to mention that men should not have long hair or wear any jewellery. (I must however state that there is a wave of cultural revolution taking place in the country which is changeing the way that all South Africans see their world, and this wave is, if it doesn't become too commercialised, a wonderful, creative force)

I have started off with a crusade in mind: to do all that I want to do in my life, and at the same time connect my disparate urges and needs. I will have a successful career where I can make a difference in the way that the mainstream world (or at least a very small part of it) runs, or interacts. I will also indulge my primal and not so primal needs to express myself by modifying my body to reflect the way that my mind and soul are developing.

I currrently have 18mm diameter stretched earlobes, 6mm diameter stretched cartilage in my left ear, a 5mm diameter septum ring (My other facial piercings- tongue, labret, ears, eyebrows- were not correctly placed or I got bored of, so I took them out). I am stretching my nipples (with weights, not in terms of diameter), which have 6mm diam rings in them, and hang, on a hot day, a good centimeter down my chest. (I think this is pretty impressive, considering I did not have protruding nipples at all before I pierced them). I am also stretching my navel ring, which is taking forever to heal, never mind being stretched! My PA is 5mm in diameter ( I took it to 6mm, but the ring was too heavy, and was tearing the hole)

my tats are growing too, although I was into piercing long before tattooing. I have a half sleave of negative tribalesque on the one arm, and a celtic armband, from which 'hangs' a large turquoise feather on the inside of the arm on the other side. I also have an art nouveau colour design on my back which no doubt will grow down my back as I develop.

My body is my hobby, my joy, and a full time job! I am growing myself a body as life grows me a personality. I love who I am, and what I want. I just hope the world whose mind I want to investigate lets me in to see it. Otherwise I will have to barge in and see anyway.

One thing is for sure -- there are a lot of people who are afraid of what is inside themselves, not to mention what is 'out there'. I will not be one of them. I will be myself. And I applaud groups of people such as bme who are not afraid to explore the world, both inside and out. It is encouraging for those of us who often go for a long time without positive re-inforcement about celebrating our bodies by adding to them (or in some cases taking away from them), as WE decide.

To all you people out there who are derided for having a nose stud, or wanting to castrate yourselves, or anything else that you want to do, take heart, there are lots of us out here who will not be deterred.