I hope you might remember me, my name is Nefarious. My childhood was surrounded by BME and I have missed it in the past years, so hello I hope you are doing well. As you may already know, today 10 years ago my dad Shannon Larratt passed away. And if you were not aware, my mom Rachel Larratt passed away last year in June. Together they built BME and created a place where people truly had freedom. BME may have not been as active recently as it was in the past, but I do not want to let it die with them. Unfortunately through those years of neglect, the site and community have deteriorated. Since my mom’s passing we have been dealing with hosting issues, unforeseen struggles, and a string of bad luck. We’re still gaining full control over some accounts. It is very complicated, but we are asking for patience. We are trying to get it back, but this time it will take longer than it has before.
I cannot promise that the millions of photos and videos since its inception in 1996 are safe right now, but if it does come to it, together we can create a new collection. Jon, Jen, Marks and I have worked tirelessly trying to keep BME online, and we will continue to do so. In the meantime we will keep this blog running, and we are launching a private website that will allow us to stay connected.
Times have changed and so have all of you. BME on the other hand has had nearly no changes in the past 15 years. We are overdue for more than just a makeover and recent events mean that BMEShop is our only source of income right now. If you ever want to make suggestions, or even just want to send a friendly letter, please reach out at [email protected].
– Nefarious
BME/News and Modblog highlight only a small fraction of what
I am a member since shortly after BME began. I met your mom and dad at Mod Prom in Canada. (Actually there was a small one prior). Since then I have lost my husband who died in 2004. He was the one that found BME for us. I don’t really go there a lot anymore. I remember when your Mom was living in South Carolina. We were actually taking to each other during the flooding in her basement and she was worried about the BME mechanics. Then she when through helping the community after the flooding. I am now one of the older people from BME. Rachel archived my page and I thing my husband’s as well. I will gladly support BME in any way I can. I would love a new BME shirt too. I wish you all the success each and everyone of you! Stay weird! Stay Calm! BME 4 ever!
Love,
Debi Spillan
I think my first name was ds55e and later Shalla Bal and my husband was Noranran?
<3 Nefarious.
I have your dad’s RoboCop ring he made that was a gift. my friend Melissa has the zombie ring just like it. it warms my heart to see this still trying to come about. I was around in the late 90’s helping with the chat and mod q &a. if you need any help, I’d be more than willing.
Matt
you can reach me at [email protected]
if you need anything
Hugs Nefarious
Hello Nefarious
I do miss the old BME days that brought so many people from all over the world together. pre 2008 before the website changed was what made it so easy, but I know there were their faults with that make up of having a limit of how many people could actually be on IAM at a time. I have my fingers crossed that you’ll be able to make it a wonderful place to gather again.
I’m also sorry you’ve had to go through so much loss in your life and I’m happy though that you seem to have wonderful supporting people around you.
if one shirt could get brought back, it’d be the bme hard girl with her hold scalpels in her hands, and a recreation of the I was cured suspension shirt of 2002. I’d buy 4 or 5 of each to keep them going for the rest of my life.
❤
So glad to see this post from you, and sorry to hear about your mom. I had not heard of her passing. My condolences.
I look forward to seeing BME restored, I would love to help however possible doing so!
Evening Nefarious,
First and foremost, thank you for this update. Through the ups and downs, ins and outs, I have had an immense respect and appreciation for your parents. Both of their passings have been an unquantifiable loss to our community. The fact you want to carry this task forward is a testament to you.
If there is anything I can do, I will do my best to hopefully assist. I know nowadays it’s difficult but hopefully there is enough of us whose altruistic tendencies can shine allowing for many hands make light work. Especially with how problematic Meta is, the issues with TikTok,etc.
Stay strong. ✊
this place has been home for many of us and your parents gave us a safe place to grow and find ourselves.
thanks for bringing it back: we are here and we support you.
<3
it’s great you want to continue their legacy. I look forward to see the new website. I was very young when I joined BME and it has had a very big impact in my life.
Holy shit, where has the time gone?! We all remember you as a cute little baby, and now you’re the adult helping us all reconnect. Your parents would be so proud of you. I think we all are. :heart
Is there any chance you can get the BME Scrapbook re-printed? Do the files still exist? I know a lot of us probably lost/stolen/misplaced it.
I remember you! I’m here and ready. proud of you
Hi Ari…. I love seeing that you are continuing your parents legacy in the body mod world. It is so greatly appreciated and beyond respectable for you to take this project on. Kudos to you, from a former iAM member.
Love,
Elaine (evilolive07)
please keep me informed. This website and community have been HUGE in my life. Hopeful to see it return 🙂
[email protected]
I’m so sad to here of all your losses, I think I joined BME back in ’98, it helped me understand I was not alone.
I hope and Pray to its return.
Oze.
to add to my posting above, if possible, another idea could be to have prints made from Shannon’s original artwork. so many people would love to have prints of those beautiful pieces.
Wow. I imagine you don’t remember the times we’ve met, but this is such a wildly heartwarming post to see from you, Ari. Your parents built something truly wonderful here, and I’m excited to see that it’s something you’ve been able to embrace.
Looking forward to where this goes in the future.
Hugs and lots of love. I remember you, and playing with the hoover robot in the basement with you.
I’ve got a lovely photo of you and your dad when we were winter swimming, if you’d like it.
I’m so sorry to hear of your mothers passing. I hope to see BME or a new BME site again someday, I made so many lifelong friends and connections through BME and IAM. It shaped who I am today.
First of all, I am so so sorry for your loss.
I was searching for BME today after many long years.
BME (BME.freeq) was a refuge for me growing up and finding community with like minded individuals in a time where there were none. I spent so many hours talking with people on chat, and got to meet several in person, and still have a connection or two today.
My first interactions would have been about 20 years ago.
A special memory I will always have, as trivial as it is, was when a photo of myself I submitted, was on the feature photos of the homepage.
I am sure you have a network, but I might be able to help, and I would love to. Please let me know
Formally: drink_the_bleach
I just saw this while working on a nostalgia project from my youth on the internet in the 90s and what things I miss and what shaped me. BMEzine was something that had a profound impact on the perception of body modification in the mainstream. I was a little too young/too shy/too green to really maximize my time on IAM or within BMEzine in general but it was critical to showing me the possibilities and teaching me how to find safe and reputable people which really needs to be emphasized. Not all the resources were in-house, as you know, but BME was always very careful about making sure to curate accurate information and making sure those resources were available and I have no doubt it kept a lot of people safe.
Shannon, your dad, I respected for a lot of reasons. Obviously I knew him as a persona online and the disconnect is recognized. I won’t say over the years I always agreed with him but I respected several things he pushed. I respected the way BME had the system in place with IAM to value and compensate user generated content, for one, and that IAM existed as a space behind a gate to limit the exposure of what at the time were still highly taboo expressions even at their most tame. I respected the work he did to disseminate information about the history of body modification and biographies of extreme practicioners even if they were controversial. Particularly, for me, learning about Gauntlet and the history of gay S&M communities who are such a part of the piercing story is something I value as many sources from that period would/did not discuss them due to homophobia. As it is often I am surprised that very well versed people younger than me do not know about. BMEzine’s work preserved this history when the larger culture weren’t ready to accept it.
Obviously I have no idea about the schism between Rachel and Shannon. It wasn’t for me to know and the way it bled into so much was disappointing. It was when I left BME and I know it was the reason many people walked away. For me what changed and why I left was because BME went from a place that hosted interviews, photos, etc from people of all types. Not all were worth respect, not all were conventionally attractive and not all of them had perfect body art. While the community I have no doubt had a lot of opinions about different submissions BME never in its public media made fun of anyone for their art or bodies. When that changed I was disgusted and left. BME, having IAM and community spaces, was not an empty shell like Facebook. What the website did reflected on participants so the public meltdown and the more judgemental content affected the desire to be included for a lot of people I knew.
This has gotten too long. BMEzine is very important. It’s a trip to see you posting because I have memories of you from what your parents posted and what I remember is how loved you were and how proud they were as you grew up and into your own person. I don’t normally write but it is that feeling of love that made me want to respond to say that there is a lot I think should be done regarding BME and I think there are people who would feel happy to see you do it be it a history or to create something new. The community used to be so small and it is no longer so that close knit community probably isn’t a possibility but I wonder if something like IAM has a place in the judgmental, public internet.
You have a lot of people who would be happy to help you do something with this legacy. That era of the internet is also becoming something that people want to learn about and are really impressed by a lot of features of it. I hope you are able to create something that makes you feel proud and in spite of such early losses in your life I hope you are doing well. I’ll keep my eye out for what you come up with next.
This warms my heart and brings a tear to my eye. Nefarious… your father and I were good friends. He had a tremendous impact on my life in very positive way. When your father was juggling how quickly bme was growing while he was still working at stainless studios making jewelry….we met and I took over his job making jewelry so he could focus on bme. That was in the summer of 1995. I moved to Toronto from Kingston and crashed with your dad. Eventually we got a house with some roommates and lived together for about a year. I watched as things grew with bme and how your dad became more successful in his various endeavours. All the vehicles he had….etc.
I remember going by to visit him one day and he had just purchased a Batmobile car…lol
Your dad was such a wonderful person.
I never met your mom as I moved out west in 2001.
I wish you all the best in your endeavours.
Sincerely
Dennis
Thank you.
I like BME
Please don’t give up. We are ready to help you.
♡♡♡