Seriously, I don’t know how many older eunuchs and otherwise heavily genitally modified men I’ve interviewed that use it to pick up women. I don’t know what cougeriffic thing happens to women when they hit thirty-five, but wow, tell them you’ve got no nuts or that you have a split penis and I don’t know if it’s curiosity or sexual boredom or what, but it’s a guaranteed successful sarge…

My friend Chris writes, “I have been a eunuch for over five years now and it’s the best thing I ever did. I use testosterone shots every ten days to keep everything functioning and the women in my life can’t get enough of sex with someone who’s been castrated. They just love the fact that they’re having sex with a balless guy!”