Mastectomy Memories

Many, many thanks to Ely for sending in the story behind his double mastectomy..

Ely, before surgery in November 2005.

My big breasts grew when I was like ten years old, and I missed my flat chest badly. I always hated them, I even wore a waist trimmer and cardboard over my breasts in an attempt to flatten them. I had dreams about having my breasts removed in hospital. One dream I remember particularly vividly was one I had as a kid, in that dream I woke up with my flat chest sutured together with blue stitches. That dream became reality on November the 2nd 2005! I was very lucky to have a plastic surgeon perform my much wanted surgery.

One month after surgery.

I went to hospital at 5:30am with my mother and was taken to a room to be dressed in hospital robes, socks, and T.E.D. stockings.

The nurse questioned me and put all my details into her laptop. Soon after someone arrived with a stretcher, I was taken to pre-op room with other people who were waiting to be taken to the operating room. The anesthesiologist and nurses came and talked with me, they told me that they will be with me in the operating room and that I was due there at 8am. The nurse who was aiding the surgeon talked with me too and she told me that they knew exactly what I wanted and still remember the pictures I brought in and told me to not worry. The nurse then took me to the operating room on the second floor. I saw the door marked “O.R. 30″, for some reason I really liked that number! I was taken into the O.R. and they moved me from the stretcher to the table where the surgery would be performed, then they put an I.V. in my right hand. The last thing I remember was laughing, then I was out!

I woke up sometime later and saw that I was in the recovery room and asked for the time. I remember a voice telling me it 11:34am. I looked down at my chest and it was FLAT :)”

Five months after the surgery, topless and guzzling water at school.

My mother told me that my surgery was over by 10am and I was about to be taken to my room on sixth floor, when I got there I fell fast sleep for most of the day, I was woken up a few times by nurses coming in and checking my blood pressure to make sure I was doing okay and to empty my drain bulbs. A couple of times during my stay they give me a white pill with “512″ stamped on it, I still have no idea what they were! Around 5pm that day I decided to ask for a chicken pot pie and some pumpkin. I ate all of them!

Ely kicking back at the playground (summer, 2007).

The nurses thought I would throw up, but I didn’t :), I did feel a bother though because I had to call a nurse every time I wanted to use the toilet because of the I.V. and padded air things on my legs to prevent blood clots. Around 1am someone came and disconnected my I.V., then told me they would give me some antibiotics and that I could leave the hospital at 4am, I had some pancakes and more pumpkin pie to celebrate :). A little later my surgeon came in to check my incisions and said everything looked good. I couldn’t see any bruises at all, I was expecting my chest to be covered in them because I think I bruise somewhat easily. The surgeon then told me that it was time for me to go to home. My father came in to get me so I gingerly got back into the clothes I arrived in and prepared for home.

I’m so glad I wore the shirt with the zipper on the front, haha, I tried to put my black tank-top on and it was impossible, anyway, I got home fine and couldn’t stop smiling knowing that finally they had gone forever!

I still have some way to go (surgery-wise), but I’ve never been happier!

Thanks for talking Ely, and I hope the future surgeries and T injections go just as smoothly!

82 thoughts on “Mastectomy Memories

  1. Wow, that is absolutely amazing. Congrats on finally having your dream come true! Some people never get that chance. Good luck with future surgeries and life. 🙂

  2. its hypocritical that you will cover stories like this but not about breast augmentation.

  3. One very stupid question.
    Ely is a guy or a girl?

    Sorry for the question but my English is not so good, and here I saw so many strange story that can be easily a girl or boy.
    And even more the name Ely sound very neutral to me.

  4. @ Giulio from the intro “Many, many thanks to Ely for sending in the story behind his double mastectomy..” i believe Ely is male (apologies if i am wrong)

    Many congrats on achieving your dream 🙂

  5. “Me” – If the breast augmentation was done for the sake of MTF purposes and submitted, I’m sure it would be posted.
    However, this isn’t a website devoted to typical, superficial mainstream surgeries, such as breast implants, liposuction, rhinoplasties, etc. If you want something like that, Google it. There are plenty of photos.
    I would like to think that ModBlog generally has more depth than that, and so far, this seems true. :]

  6. Tranque – I was going to add something along those lines.

    Obviously I don’t have complete editorial control over what’s posted to ModBlog, well, in a sense I do because I’m posting here at the moment but you’re right, there are numerous other sites where you can read about breast augmentation.

    I’m not saying I wouldn’t post about it here if it was interesting enough but that’s not really what ModBlog’s about, in my view.

  7. This blog is all about this being cut off and cut up, not being made bigger.

    With the exception of saline genitals of course.

  8. @deadlypoison
    Thanks, I was looking for a HE or SHE in article but I miss the HIS in the first line 🙂

    @Ely congratulation for your new chest

  9. the did show a breast saline injection for a female, so i wouldn’t rule them out finding one mtf and showing it ( i know i’d enjoy seeing/reading about it).

    congrats Ely on yours!, i get mine in 15 days, how old were you when you got it?

  10. #3 & #9

    I don’t know how many people with breast augmentations are sending in stories to this site to begin with, but I remember seeing a post on here a while back about a temporary breast enhancement (I don’t remember if it was saline or what).

    This site is more about body modifications that are generally about looking abnormal instead of normal, or it’d be full of face lifts and nose jobs.

  11. Serial Stitcher – “This site is more about body modifications that are generally about looking abnormal instead of normal,”

    I’m not sure if you meant to phrase it that way, but I’d say that it’s more about people feeling happy with how they look, rather than abnormal.

    I certainly don’t feel “normal” without my piercings, and certainly wouldn’t if my tattoos all fell off overnight.

    I’m sure I can speak for Ely when I say he’d feel the same if those troublesome breasts grew back overnight.

  12. In the final photo you look so calm and noble. I dread to think what mental torment you endured before your surgery. I get the impression you have a great inner strength; your story is an inspiration. I hope you have a long and wonderful life.

  13. Great content! Congratulations!

    “A couple of times during my stay they give me a white pill with “512″ stamped on it, I still have no idea what they were”
    They’re a generic brand of Percocet. They have 5mg of Oxycodone(narcotic pain reliever) and 325mg of Acetaminophen(like extra strength Tylenol; fever suppressant and pain reliever)

  14. Tripping over my own words 😛 I was referring to normal/abnormal in terms of the opinions of most of society, though certainly things that were once “taboo” are now becoming more accepted…

    This site is certainly about people being happy with modifications, but I would say that the modifications shown are “abnormal” in that they are beyond the mainstream ones typically seen with the plastic surgery industry

  15. Congratulations!
    It really made me so happy to read this story. I can imagine that your journey to this point has not been easy.
    What is more inspirational than a person who is brave and self-aware enough to achieve what truly makes them happy?
    Best of luck for your future 🙂

  16. what a beautiful story! congrats on your surgery Ely, you look so serene and peaceful in your pictures – i can only imagine how happy you must be!!

  17. I’m under the impression that the T-injection reference indicates that this is a case of FTM surgery… turned out quite well. 🙂

  18. in the past i submitted several pictures and experiances and i am heavily tattooed, and all were turned down.

  19. 25 – Blogs are subject to the discretion of the people running it. It sounds like you’re upset someone else’s breast surgery got chosen and yours didn’t. If I were you, I’d just make my own blog if you want your story heard.

  20. Reply to #25: my pics also failed to get listed. It was a great lesson in humility. When I see pics and read experiences like Ely’s I realise there is a good reason why I should learn humility. Ely is great. I’m just a guy with mods.

  21. Great stuff, Ely! Good luck with everything to come. I’m still waiting for my mastectomy. 🙂

    #3 – I wouldn’t put non-trans breast augmentation in the same category as FtM mastectomy (though there are exceptions, naturally) because FtM surgery is not elective, it’s necessary and often life-saving. I know so many guys who were suicidal until they got their surgeries done.

  22. Everyone should have a chance to get posted
    on ModBlog, whether it be breasts or tattoos.
    Anyone getting turned down is just dumb.
    All tattoos are unique, they should all be
    Breasts are just breasts, people have surgery
    on this stuff all the time.

    Although I will say I’m very happy for Ely
    and wish him luck on any further surgeries.

  23. please excuse my ignorance, but if ely had lost alot of weight without getting the surgery, what would have happened to his breasts? Congratulations on your mod, ely, I’m glad it makes you happier 🙂

  24. you have no right to call a breast augmentation superficial… at all. because it doesn’t involve some controversial subcultural shit does not mean it’s superficial.

  25. and yes… transgender surgery is elective. obviously.

    i’m sure a lot of people almost killed themselves before they had bigger boobs.

  26. 30 – That’s what BME itself is for. If ModBlog posted *everything* that was submitted to it, it’d be about a hundred times bigger and a lot harder to read.

    On the other hand – Congrats Eli! Looking *GOOD*.

  27. Thats just so wonderful! 😀

    Congrats dude for doing it! Its so cool that you have had the guts to change your body and make it the way you want it! go hard dude!

    Kev, as a girl (not plus size i admit, but stay with me) breasts tend to be the very last things to lose weight, Its very difficult to fully get rid of boob exess, he would have still had the skin there most likely- i can immagine that this op would have still been a must even if he had slimmed. (like an apporonectomy)

  28. And i agree with Ratty- i don’t really want to read about and look at EVERY lobe pierce ever done! i like reading stuff like this because its something that i have never experienced personaly.

  29. And, Breast augmentation is a bit like a lobe pierce in this day and age- i know 3-4 people who have had it off the top of my head, saline is slightly different because it wasn’t done by a doctor… it was done by a mod- ie: a member of our comunity, so the experience will be different.

    Also, im sure that if someone wanted to post here after having breast augmentation after cancer (Similar to the piece in the publishers ring about Paul oneball) then they would be posted for sure. i see no inequality.

  30. I really don’t think I’d place breast enlargement on the same level as MtF or FtM.

    30 – Disasterous – that’s exactly what BME would be if EVERY submission was accepted. Every piercing, every tribal arm band, every lower back butterfly tattoo would be posted. The site would become completely cluttered and would take a monstrous amount of labor to maintain. Although I’m sure everyone’s modification is important to them, unfortunately not all can be posted.

  31. if he had solely lost weight (and there is no guarantee that he would have lost weight from his breasts), then he solely would have lost breast fullness. as you can see in the first picture, and also from his story, his breasts developed to a large size at a young age. it’s probably a pretty good bet that the skin was under lots of strain for a long time, so losing weight wouldn’t fix the missing elasticity… meaning the skin of his breasts would still droop and look kind of empty. surgery really was his only option, unless he wanted to bind his chest forever like he was doing. he seems so happy and content in all of the after photos! coming from a not-so-well-endowed girl, i can’t imagine having to deal with large breasts. i just imagine all the backaches, stretch marks, etc.

    and i, for one, come to modblog so i DON’T have to wade through the myriad of bad/less interesting tattoos in the world. roo tends to choose beautiful pictures of outstanding work. i want to look at the truly superb work, not the average person’s tattoo. there’s only so many flash tattoos you can stomach 🙂

    breast augmentation kind of goes along with that. i’ve seen plenty of average implants and reductions in my life, but much fewer mastectomies and breast removals. i’m not saying that they aren’t still valuable or worthwhile, but i know i’m much less fascinated with them. it’s the same reason, i think at least, that there aren’t a myriad of common tongue or navel piercings featured – we’ve all seen them… lots.

  32. How about this distinction – many genetic women who go for breast augmentation do so to fit into an ideal that’s more normal/mainstream/average.

    MTF women who go for breast – what do you call it? construction? – do so to fit into an INTERNAL ideal which definitely doesn’t mesh with what’s normal/mainstream/average. And the same applies for other types of “body modification”.

    Mammary glands were definitely scary when they started growing. I thought it was cancer at first because I didn’t expect that the glandular tissue would be HARD and lumpy.

  33. In response to the ‘breast augmentation’ comments, I believe people are a bit mixed.

    Where as breast removal is ‘seen’ as an acceptable form of body modification to be seen here and addition to breasts is somewhat frowned upon.

    I understand this is a gray area for some people. But I personally don’t understand why. It’s not like the zine is posting peoples breasts saying “look at jane/john’s new knockers!”

    When I have seen people complaining about fake breasts it’s usually in a picture that has nothing to do with the breasts other than the fact they are there and/or bared for the viewers to see. The focus is usually on the piercing, tattoos or mods of said girly.

    When you come to this page, you need to keep an open mind to EVERYTHING. From tongue piercing to tongue splitting, from breast torture to removal or adding to them. A mod is a mod folks. Inserted or lopped off.

    What people do to their bodies and why they do it is for them to know and enjoy. Feel privileged that they are willing to share such intimate details about their lives and bodies with you!

    So really folks, if it doesn’t float your boat then don’t feel the need to be a jerk and post your negative feelings about something that has been positive in someone else’s life.

    A mod is a mod.


  34. “MTF women who go for breast – what do you call it? construction? – do so to fit into an INTERNAL ideal which definitely doesn’t mesh with what’s normal/mainstream/average.”

    Construction of breasts expresses a want for (at least some part) the general female ‘norm’. Having breasts in general meshes with the normal/mainstream/average idea of a woman.

  35. If i have the money i would do it. im jealous;)
    but, dot want to be an ass, but you should loss some weight:$

  36. Soooo, is there an official word on if Ely is a man that was malformed or a woman who wants to be a man?

    I know it says “he” in the article, but many people who were born females call themselves “he”.

    Not trying to eb a dick, just trying to undersand the context of the article.

  37. According to this..

    Thanks for talking Ely, and I hope the future surgeries and T injections go just as smoothly!

    I’m assuming its a woman going to the ftm process… T injections would be Testosterone right?

  38. What amazing feedback for an obviously courageous individual! You go Ely! Your body is your temple so build it to the vision that YOU have. Reward yourself any way you like but watch that pumpkin pie!

  39. 45. no one said anything about ely or not liking the double-mastectomy. we are all being very supportive and happy for him. so i’m not sure what you are talking about. the argument is whether breast augmentations are mods worthy of being posted. i think they are definitely mods, obviously… but they just don’t interest the people on modblog. it’s not the same mod we accept as blog worth i guess.

  40. and 49… that is NOT necessary whatsoever. it’s obvious that he loves his body. and if you’re going to say things like that, at least spell it correctly.

  41. Yay Ely! The last picture is so beautiful and serene-looking.

    Congrats, and good luck on future progress!

  42. Wow, it looks incredible, even the nipples came out well.

    Ely, congratulations! It’s wonderful to hear that your family’s supporting you through this, too. Good luck during your future procedures!

  43. It must be so freeing to be able to go around without a shirt in public (and to be living the life you want, as well, of course). Congrats!

  44. i think it’d be pretty dumb if roo posted every tattoo in existence. check the galleries for that! <3

  45. @#51 & #51 – Ely is a transman – going through transition (with surgery and hormone treatment) to change his body from female to male.

    @Bill – gender reassignment surgery is NOT elective surgery. Elective is something you can easily live without but choose to do anyway. I have never met a transsexual who had that level of choice. I sure don’t.

  46. i especially like the pic w/ the water bottle and the glasses. it’s so cool that you can just max out in the park now (i’m assuming you didn’t really enjoy hanging out at the park with your shirt off before the surgery)

  47. This is great. I really like how the photos show the progression of the healing process. We don’t see enough of that anywhere on the internet. Congrats on reaching your goal Ely! And on the topic of breast augmentation in general… my fake boobs have been featured on Modblog like 6 times. Sure, piercings and tattoos were in the photos, but lets be honest, my pictures were posted because they featured nakedness. Some people in this forum seem to think that modblog is a place where only hardcore or uncommon mods are posted. others seem to think modbog is all about “real” mods and the mods are always the point of the posted photo. That’s just not true. There are a hell of a lot of nostril piercings and nipple piercings up on this page, and a lot of photos posted because the modification happens to be attached to a hot naked girl. And people complain about it , and other people “woohoo!” about it. Point is, the editors of this site post what they want with “modification” being the loose rule that guides what is posted. I think people have a right to complain and people have a right to “woohoo” and if you want to see pictures of fake boobs, no need to google anything, just look through the modblog archives.

  48. I thought elective surgery was any surgery done that wasn’t an emergency (life-threatening). Yes, you might say his state of mind might make it an emergency, but it isn’t the type like a gun shot wound where they would die if they *didn’t* have surgery.

  49. You’re right, not every tattoo should be posted,
    but maybe some people do come to ModBlog to look
    at other people’s tattoos and get inspirations on them.
    If someone is HEAVILY tattooed, that doesn’t make
    it simple, and maybe other people would appreciate it.
    I have a friend that sent in a very nice photo
    that also got turned down, with unique piercings,
    it’s not just about tattoos
    it’s about people in general.
    The site would get cluttered, understandable,
    but I would rather look at unique rituals taking
    place and piercings/tattoos than breasts
    being made smaller, in which a lot of people have done.
    Don’t get me wrong, I did find Ely’s story to be amazing,
    and I’m so glad he’s happy, but there are other stories
    worth being posted on modblog too.

  50. dear ely:
    congrats!!! super happy for you.

    dear a lot of people:
    way to ruin the focus this post.

    dear roo:
    thanks 🙂

  51. Good for you, Ely. This is not an easy road to travel but you are blessed to be on it and to have the support to make your trip a little easier.

  52. Go, Ely!!! 😀 They look great! Good luck with the rest of the process.

    (Also kudos to ovaryaction for stating so succinctly exactly what a lot of us are thinking right now.)

  53. ristintin: I was 29 at the time of surgery.

    about breast enlargements:
    praxis is right. The breast enlargements have been featured on modblog before. I have seen MTF breast surgery on this modblog 1 or 2 times before.

  54. as a gynocomastic male i found this story inspirational – i’m in my mid 20s and havent bared my chest in public for a very long time, not because i dislike people staring at it or whatever, but simply because i dont feel comfortable within myself about it…
    i hope one day to have the money to afford breast aggmentation (in my case it would also be a double masectomy), but untill then i shall continue to hide what i see as my mis-fit body, and deal with the internalized self-deprocating/self-distructive thoughts the way i always have – minute by minute and day by day..
    kudos Ely for living your life as you want to, and thank you for sharing ur story…

  55. Dear Ely,
    well done, you look ace!! Thanks for sharing your story with the rest of us. I hope you’re happy and wish you all the best!! 🙂

  56. I’ve always thought of getting mine reduced. They’re not HUGE but to my body I’d like them a bit smaller (instead of a DD to be about a medium C). I’ve always been called “boobs”, “tits”, “that girl with the boobs”…etc by school mates because of them.

  57. Alright, I’m a bit confused…was this a F2M related surgery, or was this a case of severe Gynemastia? {I believe that’s what it’s called} ^^; Sorry If I’m a bit slow.

  58. Ely — congratulations! It’s fucking amazing that you were able to achieve your dreams (literally!) and that you’ve decided to share your story with us. Kudos, and good luck with all in the future.

  59. I’m confused, also. Is this a male mastectomy or a Female to Male transgender case?

    Either way, like adsh, I have man-boobs (biproduct of low-testosterone condition), and have suffered silent shame for many years. I don’t have the money to have surgery to reduce them, so I’ve just learned to accept my shape. I sometimes joke about them (especially when I hear women complain about their perceived lack of boobage), but this self-depricating humor often elicits more awkward discomfort than it diffuses.

  60. Roscoe: This is FTM transgender.

    Also, I believe Ely is the first deaf person we have had on ModBlog, besides myself! (I am only HOH though.)

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