Eh, Maybe Texas

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Burgh heard the screams, the cries, and before he ever saw it, he knew exactly what had happened. He ran out into the backyard and there it was: His daughter, Sophie, on her first birthday, had killed and eaten a Smurf. Look at that face, that uninhibited bloodlust. Why? Who knows why. Sophie’s not talking. And not a jury in the world is going to convict a baby.

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141 thoughts on “Eh, Maybe Texas”

  1. haha oh my!
    he looks like a cute little zombie that eats the brains of cupcakes 😀

    this picture made my morning.

  2. haha oh my!
    he looks like a cute little zombie that eats the brains of cupcakes 😀

    this picture made my morning.

  3. haha oh my!
    he looks like a cute little zombie that eats the brains of cupcakes 😀

    this picture made my morning.

  10. i think more people need to loosen up and do this on their birthday, or as often as possible. Looks like fun.

  11. i think more people need to loosen up and do this on their birthday, or as often as possible. Looks like fun.

  12. i think more people need to loosen up and do this on their birthday, or as often as possible. Looks like fun.

  22. this is SO CUUUTE

    that sweet vicious baby.. already so much raw power! theres no telling what little Sophie will be capable of in the coming years.

    Happy birthday Sophie!

  23. this is SO CUUUTE

    that sweet vicious baby.. already so much raw power! theres no telling what little Sophie will be capable of in the coming years.

    Happy birthday Sophie!

  24. this is SO CUUUTE

    that sweet vicious baby.. already so much raw power! theres no telling what little Sophie will be capable of in the coming years.

    Happy birthday Sophie!

  34. I remember when my little cousin turned one we got her a little cake to make a mess of.
    So adorable!

    And I’m loving the fan fiction.

  35. I remember when my little cousin turned one we got her a little cake to make a mess of.
    So adorable!

    And I’m loving the fan fiction.

  36. I remember when my little cousin turned one we got her a little cake to make a mess of.
    So adorable!

    And I’m loving the fan fiction.

  40. this is so cute!! what an adorble baby!!
    loved this post, and storyy! haha, good morning start, eh?

  41. this is so cute!! what an adorble baby!!
    loved this post, and storyy! haha, good morning start, eh?

  42. this is so cute!! what an adorble baby!!
    loved this post, and storyy! haha, good morning start, eh?

  55. I looked at the pic and was thinking about cupcakes before reading the story…I nearly spit out my orange juice when it turned to Smurf murder. Epic. xD

  56. I looked at the pic and was thinking about cupcakes before reading the story…I nearly spit out my orange juice when it turned to Smurf murder. Epic. xD

  57. I looked at the pic and was thinking about cupcakes before reading the story…I nearly spit out my orange juice when it turned to Smurf murder. Epic. xD

  64. Normally your captions make me sick in the stomach, but this one was exactly where my mind went. Love it. Uber cure baby.

  65. Normally your captions make me sick in the stomach, but this one was exactly where my mind went. Love it. Uber cure baby.

  66. Normally your captions make me sick in the stomach, but this one was exactly where my mind went. Love it. Uber cure baby.

  82. Texas maybe? No… This is SPARTAAAAAAA!!!†††

    Alright… who is going to make this the next motivational poster?

  83. Texas maybe? No… This is SPARTAAAAAAA!!!†††

    Alright… who is going to make this the next motivational poster?

  84. Texas maybe? No… This is SPARTAAAAAAA!!!†††

    Alright… who is going to make this the next motivational poster?

  109. does nayone else even notice those disgusting ass nose gauges?

    EWWW

    gross as fuckkkk. like really….why the fuck? would you want 4 holes in your nose.

    ugly,stupid,pointless.

    cutee baby 😛

  110. does nayone else even notice those disgusting ass nose gauges?

    EWWW

    gross as fuckkkk. like really….why the fuck? would you want 4 holes in your nose.

    ugly,stupid,pointless.

    cutee baby 😛

  111. does nayone else even notice those disgusting ass nose gauges?

    EWWW

    gross as fuckkkk. like really….why the fuck? would you want 4 holes in your nose.

    ugly,stupid,pointless.

    cutee baby 😛

  127. oh good. another disgusting and unsanitary baby picture.

    and it has nothing to do with body mods.

  128. oh good. another disgusting and unsanitary baby picture.

    and it has nothing to do with body mods.

  129. oh good. another disgusting and unsanitary baby picture.

    and it has nothing to do with body mods.

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