Do You Like Movies About Gladiators?

Good morning, ModBloggers! Let’s start the day off right, with an Island of Dr. Moreau–esque hell demon. This insane Leslie Nielsen/butterfly cross was tattooed by Chris Hall at Crown and Anchor Tattoo in Barrie, Ontario, and, well…wow. I support this wholeheartedly, don’t get me wrong, but in the interest of safety, I think both artist and client should check their homes for gas leaks.

See more in Portrait Tattoos (Tattoos)

Don’t Splash Your Sister

The last time we checked in with our old pal Nihilist, he was wearing a Cephalic Carnage shirt and sporting a bone through his nose, like your common body modification aficionado/savage. This time around, he’s showing off his new tattoo, which came as a JPEG cryptically named “pussymouthfoot.” And by “cryptically named,” I mean that before his tattoo artist moved out of town, he wanted a “carnivorous cunt” tattooed on his foot, because, hey, why not. It’s like reverse vagina dentata.

(Tattoo by Duff, currently at Midwest Tattoo in Eau Claire, Wisconsin, but moving to Pasadena, California, in May.)

Stretched Lobes and Frostbite: A Cautionary Tale

Be warned: This is a pretty grisly story, and the photos after the jump are not pretty. We’ll let the gentleman pictured above take it away:

“It’s a chilly Saturday morning and snowboarding sounded like precisely what the day needed. Unfortunatly, the closest New Hampshire mountain was a bone chilling -14 degrees with a 30 mph wind chill. But did this stop me? Nahhh. I packed up and a friend and I headed up to good ole NH for some morning/afternoon shredding.

“After approximately five or six hours of being blasted in the face with negative-degree weather, I thought not feeling my ears was a side effect of just being a bit under-dressed for the occasion — no big deal …

“VERY BIG DEAL. Getting home, I noticed my lobes — or whatever skin I had from my 1 1/4″ stretched lobes — was frozen solid. Literally, to the touch, frozen, and to make it better? The bottom skin was black. So I, being the smart person I am, decided to just go sleep and let them defrost. Wrong again. I woke up a few hours later and noticed some bleeding, some liquid discharge, and some ripping. Forcing the plug out was no easy task, by any means; they were basically frozen to my skin. Finally, after getting them both off, I popped a seemingly gross mid-sized bubble of liquidy stuff and the skin just peeled off like a grape … revealing fresh, bare, bleeding skin.

“Noticing a pattern here, I decided to go to the ER and try to get Medicare, because in this situation, of course, I don’t have any insurance. That’d be ridiculous, right? All the nurses were shocked my earlobes were still attached, as if they would’ve just fallen right off my face for some reason. Basically, the worst day ever. I am not allowed to wear any earrings for about three months to see if anything heals itself or if they have to re-construct or just cut the lobe off.

Don’t go outside and risk life and — literally — limb. Be cautious. That’s my moral for this story.

This is the Girl

Meltbanana sends in this photo of her new “Zombie Elvis” tattoo. It’s a very well done piece, so I mean absolutely no disrespect whatsoever, but I had no idea Zombie Elvis looks so much like alive David Lynch. That’s good, though, because I wasn’t planning on sleeping for the next 50 years anyway.

(Tattoo by Marco Lari at Quetzal Tattoo in Milan, Italy.)

See more in Sci-Fi Tattoos (Tattoos)

The Devil in my Microscope

So this is what happens when you leave a giraffe in a jar of water for too long. God, some of you people are just sick. Can’t you just get tattoos of rainbows or sheets of paper or inoffensive circles or something? Jesus.

(Kidding! Keep it weird, friends. Dodgetheseball is the one sporting this Lynchian hell-creature.)

We Have Many Shirts. This is Not One of Them.

Mercifully, thanks to several rounds of hate crime legislation recently passed by the Tennessee General Assembly, these shirts are not available in BME Shop. That does not mean, however, that Perk and his attire are not a cautionary tale to be heeded by young men everywhere. For more family-friendly items, you know where to go.

See more in BME T-Shirt Gallery (Culture)

Everett Lee Broke Loose Again

Whoa. Hey fella, we were just, uh, we were just passing through. Sure gets dark early in these woods, doesn’t it? Didn’t even see the barn at first. Wait, did you say something? Are you hurt? You’re breathing pretty heavy, mister, is everything alright? Why don’t you come out here, mister? Maybe we can help …

We’ve made a huge mistake.

(Awesome photos of Josh by Dave Barnhouser, 13th Hour Photography.)