[NY Daily News] Last year, we were lucky enough to interview Kim Saigh, then of television spectacle L.A. Ink, and really, in addition to being a great artist, she could not have been sweeter and more pleasant to speak to. In a lot of ways, she stood in total opposition to what’s expected of reality television stars—that is, she did her best to function as a person who, it just so happened, was being filmed by a crew while doing what she would normally be doing during the day, without trying to manufacture drama or turn herself into a caricature for the purpose of making a name for herself as a member of Hollywood Elite or whatever nonsense. Well, ha ha, guess who’s not on L.A. Ink anymore! Saigh and fellow exceptional artist Hannah Aitchison have moved onto other things, and have been replaced with…wait, are you kidding me?

As the third season gets underway, the producers – or the stars – have reached into the reality show tool bag and added a new cast member, one that should come with the soundtrack from “Sesame Street” with Muppets singing “one of these things is not like the others.”

Aubry Fisher, who rose to fame, or more like shame, on VH1′s junk series “Rock of Love” turns up at Kat Von D’s shop in Los Angeles, and amazingly, without experience, gets a job there.

She immediately gets on everyone’s nerves – no shock there – including Von D’s, who is upset her brother hired her without letting her know.

Holy shit that is stupid. Seriously? L.A. Ink was never exactly high-brow entertainment, but at least the artists were, for the most part, decent human beings with considerable talent. And they’re replaced by actual garbage television run-off? Everybody involved should be very proud of themselves. Let’s see what Aubry’s bio claims she brings to the table:

– Doesn’t care about what other people think about her

– Is a self-described mean girl

– Great at starting a fire, but also good at putting one out

[…]

– Considers herself a Hollywood socialite

– Starred on Rock of Love 2

– Currently owns a karaoke business called “Crazy Bitch Karaoke”

Hey, remember when TLC used to stand for “The Learning Channel”? Ha ha, Jesus fucking Christ. At the same time, though, we also like to fancy ourselves Hollywood socialites! Jump the line, bottle service, etc.! Call us, Aubry!

[Dallas Morning News] Well, here is some delightful irony (or is it sacrilege?) for your afternoon. It seems some fellow down in Denton, Texas, visited a local tattoo establishment to receive some permanent iconography of the religious sort, and then displayed behavior unbecoming of the sentiment with which he was just tattooed! Here are the scandalous details:

A man commissioned a tattoo artist to imprint “Only God can judge me” on his upper arm Monday and then left without paying, the victim told Denton police.

The tattoo artist said the man came in to the shop in the 200 block of West University Drive with some friends and asked for the motto along with the image of praying hands.

The artist completed the work and asked for $200, according to the report. The man handed over a credit card, but the charge was declined by the credit card company. The man waited in the front of the store for a bit with his friends, and the friends slipped away.

Then the man ran out of the store, according to the report.

Obviously, we here at BME do not in any way support stiffing hard-working businesspeople, and we hope this is a wake-up call to artists across the country and around the world to only tattoo gainfully employed Satanists and godless atheists. It is for your own good and the well-being of your companies.

[Inquisitr] Hoo boy, as if you needed another excuse to get yer dick tattooed, covering the old johnson with ink could very well keep you out of jail! Example:

A UK man accused of flashing a female train guard has been cleared of all charges because of the tattoo of a lizard on his penis.

A female train guard accused 28 year old Barry Kenny of flashing his penis to herself and others while intoxicated on the train ride from Newcastle to Hartlepool. But the woman had not mentioned anything unusual about Kenny’s member.

Barry Kenny’s attorney managed to get the charges of indecent exposure dropped after Kenny was allowed to expose himself in court for magistrates to see that clearly, his accuser would have mentioned the tattoo had she really seen him expose himself on the train.

The train guard protested, however, explaining to the judge, “But Your Honor, I specifically mentioned the defendant showing me a tiny lizard!” Ha, get it? BOOSH! Seacrest out.

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